"Hi, I'm the Blue Blazer, and I love to fly high. But one thing that brings me down is people that smoke. It's just no good for ya. Take it from me, stay alive, fly high, be a survivor, (breaks cigarettes), don't smoke."

Wanna see something you don't see everyday? Are you ready for a whole new Hulk Hogan? Hulk Hogan is Ripped. To the world he's a hero, but to THIS man (Zeus), he's history! Hulk Hogan, Tony Lister, No Holds Barred!

Warrior shills Slim Jim - Snap Into It.

Coming Soon: Best Of The WWF Volume 20, Demolition, and WWF Fan Favorites - available August 9, 1989.

Sean Mooney! We're gonna get an inside look of the WWF today, since Mooney happens to be at the headquarters. And who KNOWS who's gonna show up? And as if seeing WWF headquarters wasn't enough, Lord Alfred Hayes is headed in! Mooney wants a handshake, but Hayes glares and heads on in. I knew he had to be an ass behind the scenes. Sean Mooney tries to get in but a security guard stops him. "Hi, I'm Sean Mooney!" "Yeah, we hear that all the time, can we get some identification please?" Mooney, embarrassed, sends us off to a match while he tries to get in.

MR. PERFECT vs. BRUTUS BEEFCAKE

As usual, Beefcake's opponent is less than impressed with the fact he's allowed to carry scissors to the ring. The announcers suggest the scissors are extra sharp today. Dave Hebner pries them away, while Hayes gawks at Perfect's physique. Apparently it's not as impressive as Beefcake's though, as we hear about the massive pecks, and big bulging arms. The bell sounds, we're off. Hang on - Beefcake needs to take off his coat. If I'm Hennig, I attack while his arms are behind his back in the coat. He doesn't. Lockup, Perfect is shoved back to the corner. Lockup #2 results in much of the same. Perfect is a little tired of that - talks shit and gives him a shove. Brutus shoves right back. Perfect tries a go behind - but Brutus elbows away. Lockup, Brutus gets a side headlock, holds on while coming off the ropes - Perfect tries to shove him away, and Perfect shrieks. Again, off the ropes they go and Perfect tries to get away to no avail. Perfect does get in a kidney shot which loosens the grip enough for Brutus to be shoved away - but he comes right back off the ropes with a shoulderblock. So much for that. Perfect stands - Brutus bounces - and bounces straight into a drop toe hold. Perfect jumps on his back with a headlock, but Brutus powers out and gets a hammerlock. Perfect gets to the ropes right away - Brutus takes his time breaking which irritates Perfect. Standing on the apron now, Perfect dares Brutus to come at him but Dave Hebner warns him to knock it off. 1, 2, 3, Perfect gets back in the ring. Brutus is feeling testy and wants to test his strength. Perfect puts his fingers up - then backs down. Again he heads up, and again he backs away. Hands up for a third time - they lockup this time and it's on. By on, I mean they stand there making faces for the next 45 seconds. Perfect lets a hand go - armdrag and starts to chop away! Head down - kneelift right to the face. Perfect takes control in the corner with lots of kidney punches. Brutus is whipped into the ropes - comes forward and takes a punch right to the midsection. You'd better believe he's feeling it. Perfect sees an opening and rakes the back! And believe it or not - that's the first time I've ever seen it look remotely painful, he dug his hands fairly deep. Brutus is down, so Perfect starts to kick away at Brutus like a dog. Camel clutch is put on - but Brutus will not die. Brutus reaches the ropes with Perfect on his back - then falls forward dropping Perfect face first onto the turnbuckle. Needless to say, he doesn't appreciate being dropped on his nose, and starts to kick the crap out of Brutus. Brutus quickly fires back, so Perfect rakes the eyes before anything can develop. Perfect works over Brutus on the mat with a series of stomps and forearm shots. Brutus pounds the mat, and apparently he's hulking up. Perfect puts him in the corner, but Brutus reverses that right away and starts to pound away. The last one sends Perfect right over the top rope to the floor. Perfect rolls right back in, but he's not looking so sharp as he's run into the turnbuckle right away, then nailed with a big time atomic drop. Here's the wind up, and the pitch - wham right to the head of Perfect. Perfect's on his knees - and takes an elbow. Whip - backdrop. Another whip - and Brutus comes running with a kneelift. Announcers speculate the sleeper is forthcoming. Brutus punches him another time - and Ron Bass has hit ringside. He starts rummaging through Brutus' bag, which leads Brutus to the floor. He starts hammering away, and Perfect follows. Double axehandle from the apron connects, Perfect rolls back in, and the bell rings. We have ourselves a countout, and the Perfect Streak continues!

Time: 8:38
**

Sean Mooney's made it inside, and stands among video tapes. He's amazed what telling someone just who you are AND $20 will do for you. The day I have to pay money to get inside the building I work at is the day I quit, but maybe Mooney's got a birth defect of some kind. This is the WWF's video tape library, and John Armor runs it. He's fairly grouchy and wants to know what Mooney wants. Mooney's looking for a tag-team title match involving Demolition and the Powers Of Pain. John sends him way down to the end of the shelf - then hits a button that closes it. I get the feeling the WWF isn't a very pleasant place to work…

THE POWERS OF PAIN (with Mr. Fuji) vs. DEMOLITION (for the WWF World Tag-Team Titles)

YES! Lord Alfred Hayes is calling this match with my FAVORITE play-by-play man ever - TONY SCHIAVONE! Believe it or not, he did have a fairly short stint in the WWF back in the late 80's. All four men start to fighting right away - as Ax sends The Barbarian out to the floor. In the other corner, The Warlord takes it to Smash. A whip is reversed by Smash, and Warlord comes bouncing off the turnbuckle right into the fist of Smash. Snapmare, and Smash starts to hammer away. Front facelock is applied - and we have a tag out to Ax. Double whip - double clothesline. Ax hammers at the neck area, then snapmares Warlord over. Ax keeps asking Fuji what he thinks while holding Warlord in a chinlock. Warlord is picked up and sent to the corner - tag out to Smash. Smash with kidney punches in the corner - whip - blind charge which Warlord sidesteps, and Smash goes face first into the corner. Barbarian is in. Hayes calls it a "good intelligent change". Barbarian gets in some punches and whips Smash into the ropes. Big kick to the face. If you're a new fan who saw the WCW version of Barbarian, this is the same guy, but it isn't if you catch my drift. He's actually REALLY scary at this point. Kick is caught by Smash - and he trips him right up. Smash hammers on the back, and tags out to Ax while holding the front facelock. I love little things like that - just ensuring your opponent isn't going anywhere when you tag out. Ax pounds away. Whip - clothesline runs over Barbarian. Ax calls in Warlord who does enter the ring, and he works him over in the corner by hammering away. The referee is being distracted by Smash on the other end so this is all legal. Mr. Fuji sneaks up and pastes Ax in the leg with his cane - which gives Barbarian a chance to stomp away. Referee remains distracted, so Fuji attacks Ax who's still on the mat, using the rounded end of the cane as a noose and choking him out. Warlord makes sure to step on the face once for good measure, then Barbarian knocks him out to the floor. Barbarian chats with the referee while Warlord holds Ax hostage and Fuji drives the cane into his midsection. Back in, tag out to Warlord. Warlord beats on Ax, which drops him to the mat. A blatant choke is seen, 1, 2, 3, 4, Warlord lets go. While the ref tells him off, Barbarian gets in an illegal choke of his own. We have another tag. Scoop, shoulderbreaker. Barbarian gets on a clawhold of some kind on the shoulder of Ax, and kicks away the hand of Smash which was getting too close. Warlord gets a tag into the ring, and puts on a clawhold of his own. Ax tries to power out of it, but a double axehandle stops that. Tag out - here's a shot of Some Fan yelling while Tony calls "What A Move", so I can only assume it was something heartstopping that will change the course of history, especially since Lord Alfed agreed that it was What A Move. Barbarian chops Ax viciously, which knocks Ax to the floor. Fuji lurks nearby, but doesn't touch him. Ax is back in, and Barbarian headbutts him. Warlord is tagged in, my neighbors upstairs are clearly engaging in sexual intercourse, and he belts Ax with a double axehandle blow to the back. Face to the turnbuckle, forearm smash - whip - and Ax nails Warlord coming off the ropes. Smash is tagged in. Smash punches everyone! Scoop slam for Warlord, scoop slam for Barbarian, clothesline for Warlord, clothesline to the floor for Barbarian! Here's a nice shot of the heels' tag-rope, and Smash hits a Stun Gun! Cover, 1, 2, Barbarian breaks it up. Ax comes in, and Barbarian sends him out to the floor. Both guys hammer on Smash - Barbarian heads to the top while Warlord holds Smash - and Barbarian hits the massive clothesline. Cover, 1, 2, Ax manages to make the save and send Warlord to the floor. Fuji gets on the apron, Ax steals the cane while the ref tells Fuji to get lost, and he hits anything moving! Hey, Hebner CLEARLY saw the cane in use there and didn't say a word! Fuji's had enough and throws salt into Ax's eyes, and that's enough for a disqualification win.

Time: 8:17
*1/4

Fuji breaks his cane over Ax's back, while Fink makes Demolition the official winners.

A lot of people have contacted Coliseum to see a match involving Jesse Ventura, claims Mooney. Well, he's going to take it a step further and get an exclusive interview. See, you can tell he's outside Jesse's office because there's a big sign that says Jesse Ventura with stars all around it. Some woman opens the door and asks if he has an appointment. He claims to have one, so she checks with The Body. And we wait…and wait…here she is. She has a note for Sean. See, we can see through the paper that reads "Mooney Get Lost!" but Sean claims it reads "Sean, always glad to have you drop by, and uh I'd really love to do an up close and personal interview with you for Coliseum video if it weren't for prior commitments. See you next time, let's do lunch." However, luckily for us, he does have a match lined up.

TONY GAREA vs. JESSE VENTURA

Dear god, Alfred spends the first minute talking about how if Jesse's name was Freddie, he wouldn't be like a Freddie, unless he was Flamboyant Freddie, so Jesse suits him. We have someone more irritating than Jim Ross! Jesse takes his time taking off his boa and other accessories. Dear GOD he looks like the Hulk Hogan of today. I shit you not. Jesse wants the ref to watch for the closed fist of Garea, and finally they go to lockup. Jesse goes behind right away, and belts Garea in the kidney. Jesse claims his fist wasn't closed. Pose down, complete with trademark Hulkster poses. This is scary. Garea chases Ventura around, and he hides behind the referee. Jesse slides out to the floor. Back in - they go to lockup, and Jesse nails Garea in the kidney again. Go behind, closes his fist and decks Garea in the kidney. He tells the referee he did nothing of the sort, and the referee believes him because the second one was clearly open handed. Garea grabs Ventura, and hits one of his own. Down goes Jesse. Lockup, Garea wrings the arm and elbows away at the exposed arm and shoulder. Armdrag sends Jesse to the ground - and Garea threatens to stomp on his face. He doesn't, and stomps on the shoulder. The wristlock is worked - Garea drops a knee - and works the wrist again. Is there a finer announcer than Gorilla? Garea pulls on the socket and keeps the wristlock in place. An eyepoke finally breaks it up. The face is raked across the top rope, and the referee warns Jesse. Jesse heads over, but Garea was playing possum, grabs the arm and drops it over the top rope as Garea bounces to the floor. Back in, he drops a leg over the arm. Arm wringer, Jesse shoves him off into the ropes - and Garea nails a shoulder block. He bounces off the ropes again, Jesse sidesteps and tosses Garea into the ropes, where he gets tied up in the noose! Hayes has a heart attack. Jesse pulls it even harder and the referee warns him. He goes to help Garea, but Jesse shoves Garea in the other direction. Finally he's released, and appears to be dead in the water. Jesse dares him to get up, picks him up himself, and uppercuts Garea. Step on the face - and it's only a matter of time now. Jesse chokes Garea in the ropes - then pulls back on them to whip Garea back into the ring. Cover, 1, 2, Garea kicks out! Jesse chops Garea to the mat. Whip - Garea ducks the clothesline, and knocks Jesse down. Jesse wants a TO, but no way, and Garea drives him face first into the turnbuckle. Right, right, down goes Jesse. Garea steps on his face. Right, whip - abdominal stretch is not put on right, Jesse falls back, and Garea finds himself prone on the apron. Garea stands up, sunset flip over the top, 1, 2, Jesse kicks out. Off the ropes, crossbody, 1, 2, Jesse gets away. Kidney punch, Garea hammers at the head - whip - reversed - scoop slam is blocked, Garea tries to hook Jesse from behind, but he runs to the corner, ducks down, and Garea heads into the top turnbuckle head first! Jesse has an opening, elbowdrop, 1, 2, 3!

Time: 10:31
*

Welcome to the studio where producers work the syndicated programming. Kevin Dunn stands and watches the whole operation while young producers strut their stuff. Kevin's rather annoyed that Sean Mooney's around, because they've been there 12 hours straight without food. They've been putting together Mooney's shows and are not pleased. Mooney goes near the equipment and hits the wrong button. I believe humor is what they were trying to find here…

BAD NEWS BROWN vs. RANDY SAVAGE (with Elizabeth) (in a Harlem Street Fight for the WWF World Heavyweight Title)

Bad News attacks the second Savage steps through the ropes. Yeah, I'm once again blessed with Schiavone and Hayes! Brown kicks Savage, and he tumbles to the floor. Savage gets to his feet and fights back. Elbow is blocked, and Savage is drilled with a headbutt. Brown gets himself an OLD SKOOL chair and drives it into Savage's midsection. Savage gets choked with the chair in the middle of the ring, while Schiavone believes Brown has a chance in hell of winning. Savage gets tossed over the top rope, and Liz goes to comfort her man. Brown doesn't care though, and grabs Savage by the hair and throws him on the timekeepers table. Liz runs away from the Brown, who's sporting a lovely blue New York Mets t-shirt, to enhance his badass image I'm sure. More shots to the head of Savage. Savage is placed in front of a ring poll - Brown swings, Savage ducks, knuckles break, crowd roars. Savage throws Brown on the table, then rolls him in. To the top - double axehandle. Savage takes off his weightlifting belt, and drives it into the midsection of Brown. Another shot. Savage threatens to take out the ref, and Schiavone CONDONES it because it's legal. Savage whips Brown on the mat, then chokes him with the belt. Savage goes to the floor, and grabs himself a chair. To the top rope he goes - flying with the chair - Brown hits him in the midsection and the chair comes loose. Brown gets the chair and drives it into Savage's midsection. To the floor again - Savage is tossed into the front row. Brown takes the timekeeper's table and places it in the ring. Savage climbs slowly over the guardrail while Brown sets it into the corner. Brown punches Savage and whips him at the table - but it's reversed and Brown (with ref) go through the table. For whatever reason, Brown recovers first, and hits the Ghetto Blaster! The referee is out cold and no count can be made. They're denying the man! Racism, racism, racism. Scoop slam for Brown, and just as the referee was waking up he dies again. BOOOOOO! Brown wants that referee up, and smacks him around. Scoop - but Savage slides down the back right into a backslide, 1, 2, 3.

Time: 6:47
**1/4

Bad News beats up Savage for awhile, then beats up the two referees for awhile. Savage rolls back into the ring while a referee is in the Tree Of Woe and Savage brawls with Brown. Brown kicks his ass in the corner and chokes him out. You ring that bell a million times, it might do something! Savage freaks out and jumps Brown, while Paul Roma, Red Rooster, Ronnie Garvin, Mike Sharpe, Greg Valentine, and others break up the fight.

Sean Mooney's still on the move - this time into Master Control. Some guy named Chuck won't tell Sean how the equipment works. Neither will Annette or Chris. Rather than try to explain something he doesn't understand, Mooney sends us off to our next match.

RICK RUDE and ANDRE THE GIANT (with Bobby Heenan) vs. JIM DUGGAN and JAKE ROBERTS

Is this what Jim Ross would refer to ass bowling shoe ugly? Duggan of course spends the first minute walking around the ring giving everyone a thumbs up. Andre, thankfully, starts to strangle him. Duggan gets slammed face first into two turnbuckles, and takes an Andre headbutt before Andre decides he's had enough and tags out. Rude decks Duggan, then drops a knee. To the top rope - whatever he tries misses, and Rude lands on his feet. I'm guessing it was the same thing as being hit with an atomic drop because he sells the miss. Duggan points, and Jake Roberts gets in the ring scaring Rude. Jake fires off a flurry of punches. Whip - boot to the midsection. Jake beats the piss out of Andre, who falls back into the ropes just like he would at Wrestlemania VI and I guess is incapacitated because his hands are tied. Jake keeps firing at Rude, then calls over Duggan. Together they grab Rude like a battering ram and run him right into Andre's midsection while the referee works on getting Andre loose. Again the duo use Rude as a battering ram. Jake scoops up Rude - gutbuster. Enough of that though, Andre's loose and a headbutt is more than enough to turn the tide. Rude drops a forearm across the back of the neck, then sends Jake into Andre's knee. Whip - boot to the midsection - snapmare into a headlock. Andre wants a tag, and does get it. Jake tries to escape the hold of Rude, but can't before Andre comes over. Andre does a whole lot of nothing until applying a front facelock, using the strap from his tights to hold Jake in place. Duggan tries to do anything, but the referee keeps him back. Tag back out to Rude. Rude puts the headlock back on, and Jake's fading. Duggan reaches as far as he can to make the tag, but that darn tag-rope just isn't letting him get close enough. Rude covers, 1, 2, Jake kicks out. Rude nails a fistdrop and heads to the top rope. Duggan shakes the ropes, and it's enough to cause Rude to stumble and fall. With Rude hung up on the top, Andre gets in to stop Jake from reaching his corner. Andre slams Jake face first to the turnbuckle, and that's enough to knock him out. Rude officially tags out, and Andre stomps on Jake. Jake is put in the corner and Andre goes for a buttsplash. Jake just ducks away, and it misses which gives Roberts a chance for the tag. He makes it, and Hacksaw's on fire. He hammers home the punches on Andre who's still sitting in the corner. 10 punch count along. Duggan works the shoulderblocks, but Andre gets a knee up and Duggan's down. Here's a tag to Rude. He literally circles Duggan like a shark waiting for Duggan to stand so he can strike. Shot to the back - and a series of forearms to the head. Duggan is choked out in the ropes, and Rude swivels the hips to the delight of at least one VERY loud female. Duggan fires back, so Rude rakes the eyes. Duggan can't see, and walks right into a headbutt. Rude covers, 1, 2, Duggan puts his foot on the rope. Duggan is sent into Andre - Duggan falls back, ALMOST makes the tag but Rude stops him short. Duggan throws some rights, and Rude's staggering. Duggan bounces off the ropes - and a shoulderblock knocks both men down. Rude rushes to make a tag…but in the confusion tags Jake Roberts, who promptly tags HIM with a right. Heenan tries to send Rude to the right corner, while Andre heads over to chop Duggan. It's not enough to stop Duggan though - who makes a big dive and scores the tag. Jake's in, and Rude is begging for mercy. Jake doesn't offer it, and knocks Rude down with a big right. Fans want a DDT, Jake gives 'em a short arm clothesline. That's not a fair trade! Jake knocks Andre down so he can't do anything, and heads back to Rude. DDT is set - but Andre just gets up and stops it from hitting. Duggan gets in to attack Andre, then rolls out to the floor. The referee gets tied up with Andre, while Rude takes about an hour putting on the Rude Awakening, suggesting that's not going to be the finish. Sure enough, lumbering back in is Duggan with the two by four, right to the midsection of Rude. Jake covers, 1, 2, 3.

Time: 9:51
**

Sean Mooney's moved to the audio room, and sees Larry Rosen. Larry's polite, as opposed to everyone else. Larry believes the audio is incredibly important. What's the point of seeing a bodyslam but not hearing the thump? Larry gets back to work, and Sean wishes he could hear what Larry's listening to. Sean moves one of the faders way the hell up hoping it'll help - which causes Larry's ears to bleed. If I'm Larry, I stand and beat the hell out of him. I've worked in production, loud unexpected screeches are NOT fun. Sean sends us off to see Ted DiBiase's million dollar belt.

Ted DiBiase's inside a limousine travelling through Grenich, Connecticut, which is THE most expensive place to live in the world. He travels down Grenich Avenue, which is where the most expensive restaurants, clothing shops, and jewellers are. Virgil's come along for the trip. DiBiase heads into the jeweller's, and takes a look at the goods. He meets with the owner, and gets the entire staff at his disposal. He wants something that will make the world recognize him as a great man - a million dollar championship belt! Spare no expense.

It's another day, and DiBiase with Virgil come back to the jeweller's, and wants to see the belt. It's not ready, but he wants to see it anyway. One man is picking the best diamonds to be placed as the centrepiece, but DiBiase wants more. The jeweller says they've already used 500, but that's not enough for a man like Ted! He needs 800. Another man is working the back of the belt, but DiBiase demands it in solid gold. "I always get what I want! Hahahahahahahaha!"

Skip ahead to yet another day, DiBiase's in a cape? He's here for his belt. The belt is ready for presentation. The cover is pulled back, and DiBiase's reaction is priceless. With eyes wide open "It's mine! IT'S MINE! The most magnificent belt ever created, and it's mine! Finally, finally a possession worthy of the Million Dollar Man. A possession to go around the most magnificent waist in the entire wrestling world, and it's mine! Finally something that will show the entire wrestling world just how truly great I really am! Hahahahahahahahahahahaha, nyahahahahahahahahahahaha, ahhahahahahahahahaha!" DiBiase rules.

Oh fuck, it's Brother Love. His guest this week is a great humanitarian, he's the most generous man ever to walk the face of the earth. Please welcome Brother Million Dollar Man. He has Virgil with him of course. He's here to unveil the Million Dollar belt. "You know Brother Love, sometime ago, I did what nobody believed what I could do. They said it was impossible, they said it couldn't be done. I bought, paid for, and owned lock stock and barrel the World Wrestling Federation Championship Belt. And when I did the impossible, it left the hierarchy of the World Wrestling Federation embarrassed. It left them with egg on their face. And the only thing they could do to save themself from this embarrassment was to steal it back from me. They stole it from me, the very belt that should still belong to the Million Dollar Man. But you know what Brother Love? They did me a favor. You see, the World Wrestling Federation championship belt is not worthy to go around the waist of an athlete of my calibre. It's not worthy of the Million Dollar Man. Before me right here is a championship belt worth a million dollars. It is made of pure gold and diamonds. Diamonds of the highest quality. Made and fashioned by the finest jeweller in the entire world. I give to you Brother Love the Million Dollar championship belt!" Brother Love can't believe his eyes, and Vince McMahon is impressed. So we have ourselves a Million Dollar champion.

TED DIBIASE (with Virgil) vs. BRET HART

Ted DiBiase demands he be introduced as the Million Dollar champion before the match. Bret Hart attacks Ted while he's making sure the belt is okay. He fires off about a dozen punches, whips DiBiase into the ropes - and lands a shot to the midsection. Russian legsweep, cover, 1, 2, Ted kicks out. DiBiase stands and takes a swing - Bret ducks, atomic drop. Off the ropes - crossbody, 1, 2, DiBiase kicks out. DiBiase heads out to the floor to stop the momentum, and tell off some fans. DiBiase heads back into the ring. DiBiase drives a knee into Bret, and chops away. Scoop slam is blocked, Bret from behind tries a rollup, but DiBiase rushes the ropes, and Bret can't do anything. DiBiase poses, turns, and walks right into a schoolboy! 1, 2, DiBiase kicks away. Again he heads to the floor, less than impressed with himself. DiBiase stalls for awhile - gets on the apron and gets hammered, then yanked over the top rope. A headbutt has DiBiase fall back and wind up tied in the ropes. Bret charges - DiBiase escapes - Bret hits nothing and falls hard to the mat. Bret falls out to the floor, and DiBiase demand Bret be counted out. Bret manages to break the count, but won't get in because he's really in pain from the miss on the ropes. Bret finally rolls in, and DiBiase attacks immediately with stomps and choking. As you can imagine, the fans don't take well to that. Bret is sent into the turnbuckle headfirst twice. Whip - DiBiase hits a clothesline. Elbowdrop, cover, 1, 2, Bret kicks out. Stomp to the face - DiBiase to the second rope - elbow to the forehead. A fistdrop lands right on target to the forehead. Pickup, vertical suplex is hit, 1, 2, Bret continues to kick out. DiBiase thought that count was really slow and gets in the face of the official. Back to Bret, a vertical suplex is blocked, and reversed! Both men are down. They start to trade punches - but DiBiase rakes the eyes to gain the advantage. Over to Bret - belly to back does connect, and DiBiase covers. 1, 2, Bret shoves him away. Into the corner - right, whip - Bret hits the opposite turnbuckle and falls. Again in the corner - chop, whip - Bret hits the corner again and is hanging on by a thread. Scoop - backbreaker, 1, 2, no! Whip - DiBiase sets a backdrop, but Bret grabs him by the head, schoolboy, 1, 2, DiBiase kicks out. Kick to Bret, pickup, Bret catches him in the cradle, 1, 2, DiBiase kicks away. DiBiase throws Bret through the middle rope and right out to the floor. DiBiase follows and drives Bret headfirst to the turnbuckle. Back in they go, elbowdrop, 1, 2, Bret kicks out. Rear chinlock is applied. Bret fights to his feet, and tries to get the hold off. Bret almost escapes, but DiBiase pulls Bret by the hair back down, and applies the hold harder then before. DiBiase demands Bret be checked. Hand falls once…twice…stays up on the third try! Virgil gets on the apron, and DiBiase chokes out Bret. DiBiase again demands Bret be checked. 1…2…and he stays up. DiBiase's had enough, covers, 1, 2, Bret kicks out. Stomp, stomp, stomp, stomp, whip - Bret ducks a clothesline - and on the other side they both hit one! DiBiase is up first. He heads to the top rope, but Bret's playing possum, gets up and tosses him off! DiBiase stands, STIFF right hand is hit, and the boys trade punches. Bret starts blocking punches, hitting his own, and DiBiase is staggering. One final right sends DiBiase down, and he begs off. Bret's on him though, and starts to hammer again in the corner. Whip - elbow drops DiBiase. Off the ropes, elbowdrop, 1, 2, DiBiase kicks out! Scoop, backbreaker - Bret to the second rope - elbow, 1, 2, DiBiase kicks out again! Face to the turnbuckle - whip - DiBiase hits the other side, Bret blind charges, and runs his knee right into the turnbuckle. DiBiase drags him to the middle, and starts to put on the spinning toe hold. On the third spin - he's shoved away and DiBiase falls to the outside! Bret with a slingshot, and crossbody out to the floor! They trade punches again, and we have a double countout.

Time: 16:00
***1/4

That ending SUCKS. Virgil gets chased by Bret - but DiBiase goes to save, so Bret drops him. A headbutt sends DiBiase to the outside, and that's it for this.

Sean Mooney has Kevin Granith, a producer from the WWF. He apologizes for everyone's behavior, explaining they're under a ton of pressure to get a lot of work done in a short time span. Kevin wants Sean to wait in the office for just 5 minutes, and he'll be with him to give him anything he needs. Sean heads into a dark room, Kevin locks the door, and it's revealed it's the Set Storage. A loud clattering can be heard, and the copyright is up.

Total Matches: 6
Average Match Length: 10:01
Average Match Rating: 1.96 stars
Overall: **

Take a pass on this one - the wrestling's nothing you can't see anywhere else and better. The main event is solid, but the lack of a winner is really irritating. Kinda like RAW every week.

Crunch Classic from 1992 is on the horizon.